I've become so numb and transpired to emptiness. I'm no longer prone to such vulnerability which is relieving in it's own right, but it feels lonelier than ever now. I'm having trouble caring about anything that matters. I can barely laugh or smile while I'm at school. I avoid people and I don't really care to keep in touch with people. I've got a lot of important decisions to make in the next few months but I don't know if I have the strength or motivation to do so. Trying to maintain a positive attitude towards any progression in my life at all hasn't lasted more than a few days. I'm well aware of where I falter but I seriously lack the will to get back up again. I need to brush off and move on. I want to let go of the past.